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  #1  
Old 04-06-2012, 03:39 PM
appletonbill appletonbill is offline
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Posts: 361
Default You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

The year is 2016 and the U.S. has just elected the first woman president,
who happens to be from Wisconsin. A few days after the election, the
president-elect, whose name is Susan, calls her Father, Ole, and says,'So,
Dad, I assume you will be coming to my inauguration?'

'I don't tink so. It's an 18 hour drive."

'Don't worry about it Dad, I'll send Air Force One, and a limousine will
pick you up at your door.'

'I don't know. Everybody will be so fancy. Vhat would your mother vear?'

Oh Dad ," replies Susan, 'I'll make sure she has a wonderful gown
custom-made by the best designer in Washington.'

'Honey,' Ole complains, 'you know I can't eat dose rich foods you eat.' Do
day serve tap beer?

The President-to-be responds, 'Don't worry Dad. The entire affair will be
handled by the best caterer in Washington; I'll ensure your meals are salt
free. You and mom just have to be there.'

So Ole reluctantly agrees and on January 20, 2017, Susan is being sworn in
as President of the United States. In the front row sits the new
president's Dad and Mom. Dad noticing the senator sitting next to him
leans over and whispers, 'You see dat woman over dare wit her hand on
da Bible, becoming President of da United States?'

The Senator whispers back, 'You bet I do.'

Ole says proudly, "Her brother played football for da Green Bay Packers."
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  #2  
Old 04-06-2012, 04:20 PM
JBAUER94 JBAUER94 is offline
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Default

Lol nice

Sent from my iPhone using FRF App
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  #3  
Old 04-06-2012, 07:27 PM
SC Cheesehead SC Cheesehead is offline
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Posts: 87
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Ja hey, and it's the truth, enso!

------>

Here's one for the Bears fans:

Did you hear the Bears are moving their team to Gary, Indiana?

No, why would they do that?

They want a "G" on their helmets, too...

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Last edited by SC Cheesehead; 04-06-2012 at 07:29 PM.
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  #4  
Old 04-06-2012, 08:24 PM
pooleo pooleo is offline
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Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

I guess I dont get it

Is it something to do with "da bears" phrase that is said...
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  #5  
Old 04-06-2012, 08:40 PM
RAT Ranger RAT Ranger is offline
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Talking Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

So your sayin ya havta be a "Mini-Dak" or "Chez-Head" to understand it?????
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  #6  
Old 04-07-2012, 09:41 AM
Twin City Ranger Twin City Ranger is offline
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Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Ole, who is growing quite elderly, is resting peacefully on his front porch when he sees a cloud of dust up the road.

He watches a farmer approaching, with a wagon. "Good afternoon! Where are you headed?" hollers out Ole.

"Afternoon. Home to my farm," says Sven.

"What do you have in da wagon?" Ole continued.

"Manure," said Sven.

"Manure, eh? What do you do wit it?"

"I spread it over my strawberries," Sven says matter-of-factly.

"Vell," says Ole, "ya should come over here for lunch some day. Ve use whipped cream."

__________________________________________________ __________

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Minnesota.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't even work there, you may live in Minnesota.

If you've worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may live in Minnesota....

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Minnesota.

If "vacation" means going anywhere "Up North" for the weekend, you may live in Minnesota.

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Minnesota.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Minnesota.

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Minnesota.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you may live in Minnesota.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Minnesota.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Minnesota.

If the speed limit on the highway is 70 mph -you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Minnesota.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Minnesota.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Minnesota.

If you find 10 degrees "a little bit chilly", you may live in Minnesota.

Don't cha know.
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2003 XLT Ext Cab. 3.0 2wd. Auto. Current driver.
1996 XLT Reg Cab. 2.3 2wd. Manual. My 1st Ranger.

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  #7  
Old 04-07-2012, 04:18 PM
appletonbill appletonbill is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 361
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Twin City Ranger View Post
Ole, who is growing quite elderly, is resting peacefully on his front porch when he sees a cloud of dust up the road.

He watches a farmer approaching, with a wagon. "Good afternoon! Where are you headed?" hollers out Ole.

"Afternoon. Home to my farm," says Sven.

"What do you have in da wagon?" Ole continued.

"Manure," said Sven.

"Manure, eh? What do you do wit it?"

"I spread it over my strawberries," Sven says matter-of-factly.

"Vell," says Ole, "ya should come over here for lunch some day. Ve use whipped cream."

__________________________________________________ __________

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Minnesota.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't even work there, you may live in Minnesota.

If you've worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may live in Minnesota....

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Minnesota.

If "vacation" means going anywhere "Up North" for the weekend, you may live in Minnesota.

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Minnesota.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Minnesota.

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Minnesota.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you may live in Minnesota.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Minnesota.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Minnesota.

If the speed limit on the highway is 70 mph -you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Minnesota.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Minnesota.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Minnesota.

If you find 10 degrees "a little bit chilly", you may live in Minnesota.

Don't cha know.
LOL. That works for Wisconsin too neighbor.
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  #8  
Old 04-07-2012, 04:43 PM
appletonbill appletonbill is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 361
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SC Cheesehead View Post
Ja hey, and it's the truth, enso!

------>

Here's one for the Bears fans:

Did you hear the Bears are moving their team to Gary, Indiana?

No, why would they do that?

They want a "G" on their helmets, too...

Nah, Ole thinks more of the GB Packers than his daughter being inaugurated President. Rightfully so.
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  #9  
Old 04-07-2012, 09:12 PM
Twin City Ranger Twin City Ranger is offline
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Posts: 365
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Quote:
Originally Posted by appletonbill View Post
LOL. That works for Wisconsin too neighbor.
Very true.
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2003 XLT Ext Cab. 3.0 2wd. Auto. Current driver.
1996 XLT Reg Cab. 2.3 2wd. Manual. My 1st Ranger.

An expert is someone who knows everything about something they've never done before.
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  #10  
Old 04-07-2012, 09:19 PM
SC Cheesehead SC Cheesehead is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 87
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

SIGH!

There are some things I miss about the Midwest, and "talking junk" with the neighboring states is one of them...

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  #11  
Old 04-07-2012, 09:39 PM
NewAtThis NewAtThis is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 51
Default

Wisconsin pride!!!!!
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Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a truck is, you know. It's not just a frame and a cab and a bed and engine, that's what a truck needs but what a truck is... what the Ranger really is... is freedom.

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  #12  
Old 04-08-2012, 08:05 AM
appletonbill appletonbill is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 361
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewAtThis View Post
Wisconsin pride!!!!!
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  #13  
Old 04-08-2012, 03:37 PM
Twin City Ranger Twin City Ranger is offline
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Posts: 365
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

'Sconi.
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2003 XLT Ext Cab. 3.0 2wd. Auto. Current driver.
1996 XLT Reg Cab. 2.3 2wd. Manual. My 1st Ranger.

An expert is someone who knows everything about something they've never done before.
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  #14  
Old 04-08-2012, 03:48 PM
appletonbill appletonbill is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 361
Default Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

True Wisconsinites know…

Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.

"Vacation" means going up north past Hayward for the weekend.
You measure distance in hours.

Your whole family wears green and gold to church on Sunday.

You can drive 65 mph through two feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.

You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.

You think the four major food groups are: cheese, beer, fish and venison.

There are seven empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time.

You refer to the Packers as "we".
.
You can identify an Illinois accent.

You have no problem spelling Milwaukee.

You consider Madison exotic.

You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow/deer next to your blue spruce.

You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

A brat is something you eat.

Down south to you means Chicago.

Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new machine shed.

Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

You find 0 degrees "a little chilly".

You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Wisconsin friends.
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  #15  
Old 04-09-2012, 05:10 AM
RAT Ranger RAT Ranger is offline
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Talking Re: You may have to be from Wisconsin, Minnesota or the UP to get this joke.

Quote:
Originally Posted by appletonbill View Post
You can drive 65 mph through two feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
===============================
Ah yea.........been there, done that, and then some when I was stationed in ND!

My theory was the faster I hit the ditch the better chance I had to get back on the road or to the other side on a 4 lane!

Last edited by RAT Ranger; 04-09-2012 at 05:12 AM. Reason: /
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