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  #1  
Old 04-01-2011, 08:42 PM
pooleo pooleo is offline
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Default "short" jokes

I rear ended a midget with my car today. He got out and said "I am not happy"; then I said, well than which dwarf are you?

I hired a midget hooker last night. I gave her 8 dollars to go up on me.

Midget cowboy complained to doctor about excruciating pain in his balls. Doc looked him over, pulled out a huge set of scissors. Midget says you ain't cutting my balls off. Doc said, no, I'm cutting the tops off your new boots.

Why do midgets always laugh when they run?....
Cuz the grass tickles their nuts!

knock knock
who's there
midget
midget who
midget who cant reach the door bell

Q: Why can't midget women use tampons?
A: Because they keep stepping on the string.....

What do you get when you cross a midget with a computer? A short circuit.

What do you get if you cross a midget with Dracula? A vampire that sucks blood from your kneecaps.

Chinese Proverb: Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

One day a man was pissing in a public bathroom and a midget walked in and set up a step-ladder. When the man looked down, he noticed the midget staring at his balls.
Excuse me, sir, said the midget. "I was just really admiring your balls. Mind if I hold them?"
Why not? said the man.
So the midget grabs onto one of his balls and says, Now give me your wallet or I'll jump!
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1999 | Ext. Cab | 4.0 | 4x4 | 4.10's
Quote:
A Gladiator does not fear death. He embraces it. Caresses it. Fucks it. Each time he enters the arena, he slips his c0ck in the mouth of the beast, and prays to thrust home before the jaws snap shut. - Oenomaus
Ball Joints/Upper A-Arms How To
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  #2  
Old 04-01-2011, 08:58 PM
Little Blue Little Blue is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
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Default

Wow, I just laughed so hard I choked on ice-cream.
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2004 Ford Ranger, 4.0L, 5 Speed Manual
Leveled, 32/10.5/16 (Metric) BFG All-Terrains
Fab-Tech Light Bar w/ KC Daylighters
'06 Taillights, Clear Corners

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  #3  
Old 04-01-2011, 09:16 PM
Radness Radness is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 158
Default Re: "short" jokes

I think I just pee'd myself from laughing at all of those. The first one, and the Chinese proverb were the funniest..
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2002 Ford Ranger Edge 4x4 - Extended Cab V6
Freedom Lover, Gun Owner, Patriot

After Hours Clan Member

"The nation that forgets it's defenders, will itself be forgotten." - Calvin Coolidge

"Love gains the final victory." - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

"Where liberty dwells, there is my country." Benjamin Franklin
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  #4  
Old 04-02-2011, 07:11 AM
terryduanemiller terryduanemiller is offline
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Default Re: "short" jokes

women is standing in the produce section, employee walks over and asks "can I help you?"
she replied "yes, looking for a cucumber" employee said "whole or diced"
she said "I have an ass not a slot machine"
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  #5  
Old 04-20-2011, 09:58 AM
GhostRanger GhostRanger is offline
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Posts: 371
Default Re: "short" jokes

I ran over a midget the other day and he started yelling at me all pissed off that my balls hit him in the head
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2004 F-150 FX4 Supercab, Dark Shadow Grey, 5.4 liter Triton V8, Flowmaster Cat Back exhaust, K&N Drop-in, Intake "Gotts" Mod, Edge Programmer, 2.5" Level, Front tow hooks, 33" Falken Rocky Mountain ATS
Future mods: CB Radio, Dual band Ham Radio

The older I get the more I realize it is worthless to worry about tomorrow when you are living today. Love your family and friends, live like there is no tomorrow.
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  #6  
Old 04-20-2011, 10:12 AM
pooleo pooleo is offline
Ban Survivor. (x2)
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
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Default Re: "short" jokes

^^^ lol, T......Bagged
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1999 | Ext. Cab | 4.0 | 4x4 | 4.10's
Quote:
A Gladiator does not fear death. He embraces it. Caresses it. Fucks it. Each time he enters the arena, he slips his c0ck in the mouth of the beast, and prays to thrust home before the jaws snap shut. - Oenomaus
Ball Joints/Upper A-Arms How To
Replace Door pin/bushing
Repair broken dome light tabs
VIDEO OHC Install
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 04-20-2011, 07:53 PM
GhostRanger GhostRanger is offline
Still here
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 371
Default Re: "short" jokes

What does a kid and a midget have in common?




They can both order thier dream house from Toys-R-US
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2004 F-150 FX4 Supercab, Dark Shadow Grey, 5.4 liter Triton V8, Flowmaster Cat Back exhaust, K&N Drop-in, Intake "Gotts" Mod, Edge Programmer, 2.5" Level, Front tow hooks, 33" Falken Rocky Mountain ATS
Future mods: CB Radio, Dual band Ham Radio

The older I get the more I realize it is worthless to worry about tomorrow when you are living today. Love your family and friends, live like there is no tomorrow.
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  #8  
Old 04-20-2011, 07:58 PM
HazardousRanger HazardousRanger is offline
Hazardous to Your Health!
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 9,995
Default Re: "short" jokes

HAHA i loved the last one the best
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Ford Ranger Edge Supercab, 2004 3.0 Auto, 2WD, 4.10 Axle 31x10.5x15 BF Goodrich All Terrain T/A KO's


My Truck Is My Mountain Bike's Ride!

Class III hitch, Rhino Bedliner, Almost Maxed T-Bar Crank, Tuff Country Add A Leaf, Custom Low Anchor Points, OEM ('99) Tow Hooks, Pro Comp Offroad Lights , Mustang Dome Light, Clear Corners, Slim Toolbox, Blinker Mod,Cargo Brake Light Mod,Expo Lighted Visors, Ultra Silverstar heads/fogs, Fog/high mod, Reverse/switched lights, Bike Fork Mounts
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  #9  
Old 04-20-2011, 08:00 PM
cheeba cheeba is offline
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Default Re: "short" jokes

Rofl!!
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  #10  
Old 04-26-2011, 01:00 AM
lethal threat xlt lethal threat xlt is offline
its a ranger thing!!
 
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Default Re: "short" jokes

what noise does a chinese camera make when you take a picture???





CRICK!
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  #11  
Old 04-28-2011, 07:36 AM
Tankboi619 Tankboi619 is offline
love my truck
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 56
Default Re: "short" jokes

That's funny.... i used it at work this morning.


Quote:
Originally Posted by lethal threat xlt View Post
what noise does a chinese camera make when you take a picture???





CRICK!
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2011 XLT Supercab 4x2
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Line-X
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  #12  
Old 04-28-2011, 10:28 PM
lethal threat xlt lethal threat xlt is offline
its a ranger thing!!
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
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Default Re: "short" jokes

Hahaha, Asian guy walks into the currency exchange, gives the teller 20yen and he got 60$. 3 days later he goes back and gives the teller 20yen again and he gets 40$ he looks at the teller and says why I get not as much as other day? Teller said fluctuations he said fruck you white people too!
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