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  #1  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:11 PM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Ford Jokes

http://www.freewebs.com/blind_bat/ford.htm

AUTOMAKER FEATURES

1-Toyota's new feature: auto engaging cruise control
2-Gm's new feature: easy to read check engine light
3-Dodge's new feature: Transmission lock up effective when stolen or driven. period.
4-Honda's new feature: redesigned exteriors for effective theft and purchase control
5-Hummer's last feature: penis shrinking chart
6-Jaguar's features: comes with its own fire hydrant so its oil leaks have a place to mark its territory
7-Saturn's last feature: comes with its own heat gun to mold the car the way YOU want it
8-Pontiac, Chev, Olds feature: interchangeable parts easily replaced often
9-Buick features: comes with it's bingo dabber, the smell of lavender and mix tape of the beach boys
10-Mini: come with its strap so you can bring it wherever you go convienently on your shoulder
11-SMART 4-2 feature: Comes with its own metal detector so you can find it everytime it falls down a gutter
12-Volkswagen feature: come with its own set of tweezers for complex repairs
13-Mercedes Feature: Come with its own hand held extendable squeege for effectively doing what your 6 wipers can't do.
14-Nissan features: Comes with its own stethoscope so you can properly hear it rusting away
15-Lada features: U.S.S.R. ownership, because in soviet Russia, Russia owns you!
16-Daewoo features: the latest advancements in penis enlargement or 2 rolled up nylon socks to be inserted at the front of your pants
17-Kia features: the latest car cover to hide the fact that you own Hyundai's uglier sibling
18-Checker last feature: a Robert De Niro look a like chauffeur with meter
19-Subaru features: Factory AWD system (All-Ways-Destroyed)
20-Mazda features: A flurorescent Yellow stripe on the roof, so it can blend in with the other speed Bumps
21-Ferrari features: a Real live pony, since the pony probably compensates in size for the owner
22-Jeeps in California features: 1 free manicure and gift card at starbucks coffee
23-Suzuki features: 2 wheels, a small CC engine and a flashy lime green paint. Seriously who buys these cars
24-BMW features: Built in smoke detector under the hood, for those humid and overheating days. Check battery once a month or you will void your warranty
25-Cadillac Features: Certified and with proof of authenticity blood stained back seat from the previous owner who was rapper was shot 9 times or more
26-Mitsubishi features: any other engine then its own since other automakers have taken them off their hands
27-Audi features: a do-it-yourself manual for the suspension since some assembly is required
28-Hyundai Features: a matching nightgown so it looks fashionable with the new $20000 slipper you just bought with too many options to list
29-Chevrolet features:a Cd of the bob Seger hit ``like a rock`` to remind you why its not getting out of the driveway ever again

more to come lol

Last edited by Rango88; 02-07-2011 at 04:32 AM.
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  #2  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:14 PM
DiabloBlanco DiabloBlanco is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

lol some of these are pretty good.
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  #3  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:16 PM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by DiabloBlanco View Post
lol some of these are pretty good.
Its sad to say that these were really easy to find but jokes about other automakers are challenging. There are too mnay ford haters out there
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  #4  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:21 PM
Fordzilla80 Fordzilla80 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Well that's only natural, i'd be jealous too if my car continuously broke down due to lack of a blue oval.
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  #5  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:27 PM
TurdFX4 TurdFX4 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Found
Off
Road
Dominating
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  #6  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:34 PM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

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Originally Posted by Fordzilla80 View Post
Well that's only natural, i'd be jealous too if my car continuously broke down due to lack of a blue oval.
Or suddenly took off by itself

Last edited by Rango88; 02-07-2011 at 04:32 AM.
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  #7  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:40 PM
DiabloBlanco DiabloBlanco is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Quote:
hummer's last feature: Penis shrinking chart

lol!
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  #8  
Old 02-06-2011, 12:47 PM
terryduanemiller terryduanemiller is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

hahaha
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  #9  
Old 02-06-2011, 01:24 PM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

post #6 updated
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  #10  
Old 02-06-2011, 01:36 PM
mazdaman mazdaman is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

They didnt mention this one , First On Race Day
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  #11  
Old 02-06-2011, 01:58 PM
Fordzilla80 Fordzilla80 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes



Need we say more?
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  #12  
Old 02-06-2011, 02:01 PM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fordzilla80 View Post


Need we say more?
nice dude, did you come up with that yourself? did you like post #6?
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  #13  
Old 02-06-2011, 03:06 PM
Fordzilla80 Fordzilla80 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

Nah, that's been around for awhile.

And yea man that was pretty funny.lol.
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  #14  
Old 02-07-2011, 04:33 AM
Rango88 Rango88 is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

I updated the the thread to move post 6 up to post 1 so its easier to keep track and also updated it, i think the chevy one is good
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  #15  
Old 02-07-2011, 05:13 AM
Clinton Clinton is offline
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Default Re: Ford Jokes

LOL...funny stuff man!!
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