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  #1  
Old 11-17-2010, 05:39 PM
RAT Ranger RAT Ranger is offline
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Talking Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

A DAMN FINE EXPLANATION...

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman and was somewhat upset --

"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!"

And the husband replied "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened."

"Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll ever say to me!!

And the husband began --

"Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was thin, poorly dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days !

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night - the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight.
I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present,which you don't use because I don't have good taste.
I went and found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas – the one that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at that expensive shoe boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."

The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, "Please, do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"
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  #2  
Old 11-17-2010, 05:47 PM
terryduanemiller terryduanemiller is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

lol, Nice!
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  #3  
Old 11-17-2010, 05:52 PM
azgilamonster azgilamonster is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

very good
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  #4  
Old 11-17-2010, 05:55 PM
mickblock mickblock is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

I almost laughed. Then it dawned on me how close that comes to reality.
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  #5  
Old 11-17-2010, 05:59 PM
MooDib MooDib is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

Lol
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  #6  
Old 11-17-2010, 09:47 PM
trucks423 trucks423 is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

lmao!
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  #7  
Old 11-17-2010, 10:43 PM
Clinton Clinton is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

Thats excellent!
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  #8  
Old 11-17-2010, 10:48 PM
2002 2WD Edge 2002 2WD Edge is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

Good one. I suspect most wives wouldn't find it funny though.
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Old 11-18-2010, 12:36 AM
2002 2WD Edge 2002 2WD Edge is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

Got this same way.

A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time.

So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site.

She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.

"Pardon me, sir, I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN. What's your name?

"Morris Feinberg," he replied.

"Sir, how long have you been coming to the Western Wall and praying?"

"For about 60 years."

"60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?"

"I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims."

"I pray for all the wars and all the hatred to stop."

"I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults, and to love their fellow man."

"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?"



"Like I'm talking to a fucking wall."
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  #10  
Old 11-18-2010, 04:19 AM
mcpink mcpink is offline
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Default Re: Got this in an email & thought I'd share the laugh>>>

Quote:
Originally Posted by mickblock View Post
I almost laughed. Then it dawned on me how close that comes to reality.
x2! It's funny because it's true.
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