Ford Ranger Forum - Forums for Ford Ranger enthusiasts!

Go Back   Ford Ranger Forum - Forums for Ford Ranger enthusiasts! > > >
Forgot Password? Join Us!

Welcome to Ford Ranger Forum

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread

  #76  
Old 11-23-2010, 12:38 AM
DangerRanger379 DangerRanger379 is offline
B. A. M. F.
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 483
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Quote:
Originally Posted by afogle2 View Post
teacher: Can anyone use the word “definitely” in a sentence?
Student: I have a question?
Teacher: Go ahead.
Student: Are farts lumpy?
Teacher: No.
Student: Well then i definitely just shit myself.
lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________
2003 | XLT | Extended Cab | V6 | 4x4 | 4.0L SOHC | 3 Inch Body Lift | Cranked T-Bars | TJM Wench Bumper | Blacked Out Heads | Fog Light Mod | Surround Delete Mod | Blinker Mod | Custom Center Console | OHC | Pacer Bullet Rims | 33x12.5 All Terrains | 1 Inch Wheel Spacers
Reply With Quote
  #77  
Old 11-30-2010, 08:31 PM
Pbav8tor Pbav8tor is offline
Flyin High

 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,869
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Two brothers have a lifelong dream to immigrate to America. They work hard and save their money. After many years, they have saved enough money and finally emigrate into New York. Before they begin building their new lives in America, they decide to see some of the famous places they dreamed of for so long; the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, the Rockettes, and others. Eventually, they make their way to Coney Island. As they stroll down the beach, taking in all the newness of America, they see a very large billboard that reads: "HOT DOGS," with a big arrow pointing down to a little hot dog stand. Being hungry and seeing that having an American hot dog would be something new, they decide to try one. So they order two hot dogs and sit on a nearby bench to enjoy another piece of Americana. The first brother sets his hot dog in his lap, unfolds the paper wrapper, looks at his hot dog for a moment, and suddenly wraps it back up. He then turns to his brother and says, "What part of the dog did you get?"

----------

Three old Grannies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home when an old Grandpa walked by.

One of the old Grandmas yelled out saying "We bet we can tell exactly how old you are!" The old man said, "There is no way you can guess it, you old fools!" One of the old Grandmas called back "Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we can tell your exact age."

Embarrassed just a little, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers.

The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times. Then they all piped up and said, "You're 87 years old!"

Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, "How in the world did you guess?" Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily yelled in unison... "We were at your birthday party yesterday!"
__________________
03 RANGER EDGE 3.0
60/40 Seat Mod, Expo Full Console, Expo Mod Diff Cover, Thunderbolt Signal Mirrors, Flowmaster, Billet Grills, One Piece Halo Projector Headlights, HID Fogs w/Halos,
LED Lightbar, Euro Taillights, Interior Accents Painted, OHC, Indigo Cluster, 7" LCD Headunit, Mustang Dome Light, Manik Brush Guard
PNW CREW
Reply With Quote
  #78  
Old 12-07-2010, 03:45 PM
TurdFX4 TurdFX4 is offline
Sept. 2011 TOTM
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,771
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

I heard a different variation of one of my favorite jokes today:

What is the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner?


The location of the dirt bag.
Reply With Quote
  #79  
Old 12-07-2010, 05:48 PM
richarddhoward richarddhoward is offline
Road Trippin' King!
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,010
Send a message via MSN to richarddhoward
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

I heard this one on the Men's Room for those of you in the upper PNW around Seattle...this will probably make Marie mad...

There were 4 women sitting around, minding their own business...
__________________
97 Ranger - 4.0 V6 auto, 4wd, 31x10.5x15s Wild Country XTX Sport All Terrains, Warn locking hubs, Pioneer deck with iPod attachment, Snugtop Topper, K&N filter, scan gauge II, Hella 500 Lights, More parts coming, waiting for the paycheck to get bigger!

Truck built in loving memory of Norm Howard
Outcast Racing
PNW Crew!!!
Afterhours Clan!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by aaron_ariens View Post
I think Henry just shit himself
Quote:
Originally Posted by Radness View Post
Its kind of like that carnival game "Whack A Mole" but with guns! Haha
Reply With Quote
  #80  
Old 12-07-2010, 05:52 PM
Tom Tom is offline
Ranger Enthusiast
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,829
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

A married couple down on their luck decides to make a few extra bucks by reluctantly having the wife work the corner. After the first day the husband picks her up and asks "how did you do?". She says, "I did pretty well, I made $200.50". He asks, "What as*hole gave you 50 cents?" and she replies "all of them".
__________________
2006 Ford Ranger Sport 4.0 2WD on 32x11.50R15s
-3" Doetsch Spindle Lift


Using the forum:
How to Post on the Forum
Creating a signature (do this before asking any questions)
Upload an Avatar (image of your Ranger)
How to Post Pictures on the Forum
Switch the site layout: Light Theme or Dark Theme

Things to do:
Participate in Truck of the Month
Participate in the Ranger Photo Contest
Participate in the Non-Automotive Photo Contest
Become a Site Contributor
Shop at the FordRangerForum.com Store
Reply With Quote
  #81  
Old 12-08-2010, 01:48 AM
Pbav8tor Pbav8tor is offline
Flyin High

 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,869
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Research for Vaseline

A man doing market research knocks on a door. He is greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.

"I'm doing some research for Vaseline," he says: "Have you ever used the product?"

"Yes," she replies: "My husband and I use it all the time."

"And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?" he asks.

"We use it for sex," she replies.

The researcher is a little taken back. "Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge," he says: "But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex. I admire you for your honesty. Since you've been frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it for sex?"

"I don't mind telling you at all," the woman says: "My husband and I put it on the door knob to keep the kids out."
__________________
03 RANGER EDGE 3.0
60/40 Seat Mod, Expo Full Console, Expo Mod Diff Cover, Thunderbolt Signal Mirrors, Flowmaster, Billet Grills, One Piece Halo Projector Headlights, HID Fogs w/Halos,
LED Lightbar, Euro Taillights, Interior Accents Painted, OHC, Indigo Cluster, 7" LCD Headunit, Mustang Dome Light, Manik Brush Guard
PNW CREW
Reply With Quote
  #82  
Old 12-08-2010, 01:55 AM
Demon-FX4 Demon-FX4 is offline
I'm a Demon, So F off!
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 6,075
Send a message via Skype™ to Demon-FX4
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tom View Post
A married couple down on their luck decides to make a few extra bucks by reluctantly having the wife work the corner. After the first day the husband picks her up and asks "how did you do?". She says, "I did pretty well, I made $200.50". He asks, "What as*hole gave you 50 cents?" and she replies "all of them".
hahahahahahaaha
__________________
2003 FX4 LEVEL II
Quote:
Originally Posted by 03 SB FX4 View Post
My D-max - will pull the Cummin' Stroke it all night long!
Quote:
Originally Posted by 99RangerAlfredo View Post
Nooo Demon does badd things to me when no one looks!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by cdawall View Post
Don't worry I next time I will just buy bolt ons so I can be just like you. Then I can drive around with unpainted fender flares and have a real prerunner
Reply With Quote
  #83  
Old 12-09-2010, 02:41 PM
TurdFX4 TurdFX4 is offline
Sept. 2011 TOTM
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,771
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Here's one but you pretty much have to be in person to tell it to someone.

Why was Hellen Keller such a bad driver?

and when the person says "Because she was blind"

you say: "No, because she was a woman."
Reply With Quote
  #84  
Old 12-09-2010, 02:43 PM
MooDib MooDib is offline
FRF Journeyman
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 505
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Quote:
Originally Posted by TurdFX4 View Post
Here's one but you pretty much have to be in person to tell it to someone.

Why was Hellen Keller such a bad driver?

and when the person says "Because she was blind"

you say: "No, because she was a woman."
Lol
__________________
2003 Ford Ranger FX4
4.0L SOHC V6 Auto 4x4
K&N Performance Air Filter
Bosch IR Iridium Fusion Spark Plugs
Reply With Quote
  #85  
Old 12-09-2010, 02:46 PM
TurdFX4 TurdFX4 is offline
Sept. 2011 TOTM
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,771
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Whats the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?



The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
Reply With Quote
  #86  
Old 12-09-2010, 11:44 PM
dcarrill dcarrill is offline
Ford Motor Company
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 141
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pbav8tor View Post
Two brothers have a lifelong dream to immigrate to America. They work hard and save their money. After many years, they have saved enough money and finally emigrate into New York. Before they begin building their new lives in America, they decide to see some of the famous places they dreamed of for so long; the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, the Rockettes, and others. Eventually, they make their way to Coney Island. As they stroll down the beach, taking in all the newness of America, they see a very large billboard that reads: "HOT DOGS," with a big arrow pointing down to a little hot dog stand. Being hungry and seeing that having an American hot dog would be something new, they decide to try one. So they order two hot dogs and sit on a nearby bench to enjoy another piece of Americana. The first brother sets his hot dog in his lap, unfolds the paper wrapper, looks at his hot dog for a moment, and suddenly wraps it back up. He then turns to his brother and says, "What part of the dog did you get?"
hahahahahaha

----------

A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, "Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks." The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. "I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."
__________________
TOTALED 2001 Ford Ranger SuperCab 4.0L SOHC Manual 4x4
SOLD 1996 Ford Ranger 2.3L 2wd Reg Cab
Reply With Quote
  #87  
Old 12-15-2010, 09:26 PM
joker515 joker515 is offline
Ford Motor Company
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 126
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

the other night i was browsing frf and my dad walked in, he said to me, "alex, masturbation will make you go blind" (for the record, i was doing nothing of the sort) i looked at him and said, "dad IM OVER HERE"
__________________
2000;3.0 vulcan;flowtech raptor muffler; no cats;k&n oil filter;goodyear wrangler tires;spectre cold air intake;200 watt pioneer headunit with 2 kenwood jl-80 boxes holding 2 10 inch pyle subs, 2 kenwood 4x6 2ways and 2 polkaudio 4x6 plates and two xplod 3 ways in the doors;plenty of scratches dings and dents, chipped (flashpaq)
Reply With Quote
  #88  
Old 12-16-2010, 07:34 PM
Pbav8tor Pbav8tor is offline
Flyin High

 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,869
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Wife sent me out shopping today telling me to "Get something to make her look sexy". You should have seen her face when I turned up with 12 cold beers...
__________________
03 RANGER EDGE 3.0
60/40 Seat Mod, Expo Full Console, Expo Mod Diff Cover, Thunderbolt Signal Mirrors, Flowmaster, Billet Grills, One Piece Halo Projector Headlights, HID Fogs w/Halos,
LED Lightbar, Euro Taillights, Interior Accents Painted, OHC, Indigo Cluster, 7" LCD Headunit, Mustang Dome Light, Manik Brush Guard
PNW CREW
Reply With Quote
  #89  
Old 12-16-2010, 07:37 PM
mazdab2300 mazdab2300 is offline
Totally bummed
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,106
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

ive got one. they say hardwork never killed anyone. but why take the risk. lol i love it
__________________
94 Mazda B2300
jvc head unit scosh hds and xplod speakers also have 2 12 inch subs in the back.
american racing directionals on 30/9.5/15s

INDIANA RANGERS
MAZDAS
Reply With Quote
  #90  
Old 12-16-2010, 08:08 PM
Ranger Kid Ranger Kid is offline
4.Pro
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 569
Default Re: have a fav joke post it and share here

Have you heard of the new Helen Keller doll?

You wind it up and it walks into walls


Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?

I'm pretty sure you would to if you were named "urhhhgahhgaherhyhga"
__________________
91' Ford Ranger 4.0 Custom
Let's just say it's not stock

Last edited by Ranger Kid; 12-20-2010 at 02:40 PM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Baja 1000 Fav. Video Smokey Vehicle Videos 1 03-10-2010 06:41 PM
DEA Joke Tom Laugh Factory 4 02-08-2010 04:39 PM
pot smoking bear {joke} greyghost Laugh Factory 10 11-07-2009 05:28 AM
fav pony car mr.ranger Off Topic 22 09-21-2009 07:42 PM
fav ranger colour mr.ranger Off Topic 27 08-26-2009 02:28 PM