Ford Ranger Forum - Forums for Ford Ranger enthusiasts!

Go Back   Ford Ranger Forum - Forums for Ford Ranger enthusiasts! > > >
Forgot Password? Join Us!

Welcome to Ford Ranger Forum

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread

  #1  
Old 07-28-2015, 04:31 PM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Couple rednecks in a Silverado

Are driving around, pass a field with a herd of sheep out to pasture. One sheep has her head caught in the barbed wire fence.

Driver slams on the breaks, jump the fence and start fucking the sheep. Gets done, pulls his pants up, jumps back over the fence and gets back in the truck. Says to his buddy "Hey, you want some of that?"

Buddy says "Yeah, but I don't want to put my head in that fence."
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 07-28-2015, 07:00 PM
stateranger stateranger is offline
Mr H....A....P...P....Y👿
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 2,890
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

The strangest part is this might be a true story.
__________________
2014 F150 xl 3.7 6 speed auto.

Quote:
Originally Posted by pk9298 View Post
HELL TO THE NO!! Abort abort abort!! That's the first thing to go!!! Ewwwww! I'm not no vampire! I don't enjoy red tea
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 07-28-2015, 10:10 PM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

No doubt! I lived in southeastern Ohio, and down there in the hills, the inbred hillbilly stereotypes are sometimes very true. All too true many times...

Had a buddy, Crazy Craig lived in a log cabin in Meigs County, 1 electrical outlet (old kid killer refrigerator and a small AM radio). Had a wood fired stove and oven (one side) and propane on the other- great big old cast iron thing. We used to hang out down there and drink some 'shine and smoke some of his crops. One night we decided to stay the night, and I took my acoustic guitar. A guy drove by in a truck, waved, and within a half hour people were pulling up with instruments and home cooking. We had a bluegrass jam, and this old Dodge Magnum pulled up. This guy said "Y'all goan love dis, Marvin an his bitch." Figured his bitch was a woman, but it turned out to be this late 20's guy, missing a lot of teeth, wearing Richard Simmons shorts and a t shirt with the sleeves cut off.

He kept saying "Y'all wanna see me fuck a chicken?" And later "You catch 'at chicken I'll fuck it!"

And then it became a scene like Deliverance, where the two mountain people are going to butt fuck the pudgy guy (not me, our buddy Jamie, who had joined a frat and didn't hang with us for a while). Craig kept saying "Watch what happens to your buddy tonight! We're going to have some fun with him, y'all are welcome to join in, after we all have our turns!"

Had to create a diversion, got him trying to light the wood stove range thing and cook some burgers. Loaded up the car, had the seat folded forward, both doors open and the key in the ignition in the one position. Gave my friend Jeff the high sign and he grabbed Jamie got in the car and we left.

The old Magnum followed us for a while, and I'm sorry to say that those twisty roads made me hurl out the window at speed- couldn't have been all the alcohol. They were close enough that when I upchucked he had to turn his wipers on.
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 07-29-2015, 05:24 AM
johnday johnday is offline
Useless olde guy
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,225
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

"Hopefully", they were just screwing around with promoting the stereotype.

But truthfully, do you know where Englishmen come from? It's from us Scots screwing sheep.
__________________
'04 Edge, Scab/flareside, 2wd, 3.0, 5 speed, 4:10 open. Billet grille, Raceline Raptor black wheels, 265/75/16 DuraTracs. Tbar crank, AAL. Fox shocks, Thrush welded SI/DO swept back side exit. Morimoto projectors, '06 tails and power mirrors. LEDs all the way around. Blacked out fender badge. Access Limited rollup tonneau. 5% tint on back three windows. Airbox mod, FWIW. And a Border Collie that likes it too!!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 07-29-2015, 04:59 PM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

I don't think they were screwing around. They were hill people and were completely serious about taking Jamie's butt.

And that Englishmen joke was almost offensive, until I saw you said "us Scots" and I realized you weren't making fun of people of Scottish extraction. I'm a Campbell of Argyle, parents are on a visit to the British isles and Normandy France. They just visited an ancestral castle of a Duke of Argyle (something like that- might not have been a Duke but it was a Campbell's castle).

Also, Campbell comes from the term for crooked mouth, meaning that we were not to be trusted at our word. Unless you were on the right (that is our) side.
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 07-29-2015, 05:37 PM
Fordzilla80 Fordzilla80 is offline
Welcome to FRF!
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 8,952
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

What's funny is that your name is "Jay" which could be short for Jamie.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 07-29-2015, 06:34 PM
johnday johnday is offline
Useless olde guy
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,225
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

I'm about as UK as you're gonna get, LOL!! Craig clan from Blackburn, just outside of Edinburgh.
A great, great or something uncle won the Victoria Cross in WWI, William Hardy, he was with the Border Regiment. My dad is black Irish.

So trust me Jay, I know where Englishman come from!!LOL

Yep yep, the Campbell is one of the largest clans in Scotland. aye Jimmy!!!
__________________
'04 Edge, Scab/flareside, 2wd, 3.0, 5 speed, 4:10 open. Billet grille, Raceline Raptor black wheels, 265/75/16 DuraTracs. Tbar crank, AAL. Fox shocks, Thrush welded SI/DO swept back side exit. Morimoto projectors, '06 tails and power mirrors. LEDs all the way around. Blacked out fender badge. Access Limited rollup tonneau. 5% tint on back three windows. Airbox mod, FWIW. And a Border Collie that likes it too!!

Last edited by johnday; 07-29-2015 at 06:37 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 07-30-2015, 08:33 AM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fordzilla80 View Post
What's funny is that your name is "Jay" which could be short for Jamie.
No, its short for James. People all the time assume I'm either Jason, Jamie, Jake (Jay Campbell comes out like Jake Campbell) and bunch of others.

Don't really see what's funny...
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 09-03-2015, 12:46 AM
ZacktheBlackRanger ZacktheBlackRanger is offline
Sure, why not.
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 312
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaybones View Post
No doubt! I lived in southeastern Ohio, and down there in the hills, the inbred hillbilly stereotypes are sometimes very true. All too true many times...
I want so bad to be offended by this (I live in southeastern Ohio), but he's not wrong.
__________________
2007 XLT Supercab 4X4 V6 4.0L SOHC 5 Speed
285/75/16 Ironman A/T's on M/K Classic Baja's
PA 3" Body Lift - 2" Tbar crank
Thrush Welded 17651 muffler
Blue painted interior - Blue headlight mod
Blinker mod - Throttle cable mod

------------
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fordzilla80 View Post
If a chart said you were straight, but you know you like dick, would you still believe the chart?
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 09-07-2015, 06:10 PM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

Zack, Hopefully you don't live near Hog's Holler in Meigs county.
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 09-07-2015, 06:25 PM
Ordinary Biker Ordinary Biker is offline
Just call me'Two Rangers'
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 3,970
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaybones View Post

Also, Campbell comes from the term for crooked mouth, meaning that we were not to be trusted at our word. Unless you were on the right (that is our) side.
This is why your clan was one of our clans arch rivals...
__________________
'98, 2wd, 2.5l, 5spd, regular cab step side
'07, 4X4, 4.0l, 5spd, super cab fleet side
'66 Ford Mustang 289, Auto
'81 Yamaha XS850 custom bobber
'91 Suzuki Marauder

They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Ben Franklin
The best government is a benevolent tyranny tempered by an occasional assassination. - Voltaire
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 09-07-2015, 07:48 PM
ZacktheBlackRanger ZacktheBlackRanger is offline
Sure, why not.
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 312
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaybones View Post
Zack, Hopefully you don't live near Hog's Holler in Meigs county.
Perry County, born and raised.
__________________
2007 XLT Supercab 4X4 V6 4.0L SOHC 5 Speed
285/75/16 Ironman A/T's on M/K Classic Baja's
PA 3" Body Lift - 2" Tbar crank
Thrush Welded 17651 muffler
Blue painted interior - Blue headlight mod
Blinker mod - Throttle cable mod

------------
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fordzilla80 View Post
If a chart said you were straight, but you know you like dick, would you still believe the chart?
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 09-14-2015, 12:02 PM
Jaybones Jaybones is offline
Buy a Ford
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 195
Default Re: Couple rednecks in a Silverado

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ordinary Biker View Post
This is why your clan was one of our clans arch rivals...
And what would your clan be my good sir?
__________________
First On Race Day
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 09-17-2015, 05:56 PM
GLH GLH is offline
Ford Ranger Driver
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 8,818
Default

He doesn't know ...
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
For Sale: fs/ft 2000 silverado with 05 front clip dirttrackracer Trucks 0 11-21-2012 06:24 PM
Craigslist / eBay Find: 04 silverado with 11K miles! djfllmn Trucks 13 03-18-2012 02:57 PM
Rocket City Rednecks Pbav8tor Off Topic 0 01-14-2012 12:01 PM
Craigslist / eBay Find: A Rednecks Dream FFparker Trucks 10 01-08-2012 05:22 PM